Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
