aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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