sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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