She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize