I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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