My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
