Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize