i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
