Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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