In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize