It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Four minutes until I can fart!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
