I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
