She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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