every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I just found a bag of teeth...
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
