I want to walk on stilts...naked
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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