this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
