her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
