youre lurking in front of me
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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