you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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