Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
