Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
