I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We had to coat check the pizza.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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