He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
