my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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