I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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