Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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