return my video game
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
