It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
