yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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