its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize