it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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