Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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