I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Someone came in the potted fern
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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