I wish I only lived at night.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
