I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
