love makes seman taste better
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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