It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
