the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
