She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Randomize
