PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize