Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
