watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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