they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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