So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
