So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
