Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
