come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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