I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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