every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
