I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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