like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
You're like the curious george of whores
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
